Feeling Stronger.
I've been working on getting in quality training. Now that I have an official "coach", I have been more focused on getting the right kind of training in. He has pointed out what workouts are key so if work is too hairy / crazy then I can shift some things around.
We met last week to talk about some of my "issues" and he asked me some very interesting questions. His questions were based on my comments in emails to him and information noted in my training log. He pays attention, I like that. Every coach should, but that doesn't mean that they all do. So, he asked me what motivates me to train? When I'm feeling beat down and "behind", what am I behind? Or better yet, who? And you know - it shouldn't matter who is better / faster / ahead of me. It's about me and my goal. And he asked me to try to figure out exactly where my motivation comes from. I need to really think about why I have the desire to complete the Ironman. Once I identify it, I can draw from that to keep me motivated to train and to train hard.
I get in these funks (if you've read any of the other posts - you'd know that) but the funks are usually based on a crappy workout or a string of missed workouts and then I find myself behind where I think I should be at that particular moment in my training. So, that's the question - why? Why do I, Adrian Hasenbauer want to do the Ironman? Part of it is because I think of myself somewhat as an underdog. I don't think that I have ever thought I could do something like this. I don't think that others think I could do something like this (whether or not this is true is a completely different story). I have this "tough / hard - ass" personality, but am I sure of myself all of the time? No. In athletics, I'm not. I want to do something to prove to myself that I can do something great. It's not to prove to anyone else, not even my husband that I can do this - it's for me. It's to show I too can do this event that I have admired so many others for doing. I want to be that person that people cheer for as she crosses the finish line. I want to do something that one day I will show my son and he won't even believe it. Although with all my husband's medals, I won't look like I did anything "great", just that I did it. Hopefully my son will recognize that it was truly hard and I had to really dedicate myself to accomplishing this while working and being a parent!!
I've been training and I've felt really good lately. I had a great run this past weekend. It's getting colder and that makes running a little more enjoyable! I just kept thinking about how beautiful the day was and how lucky I was that I am able to run 10 miles. Some people have such a hard time with walking and here I am running around White Rock Lake just enjoying this peaceful time to myself. It was really nice to have this on my mind rather than the self destructive thoughts that usually run through my mind during a long run!!
Right now I feel like I just might enjoy training for the Ironman. I feel like I'm already in a much better place than where I was last year when I started this whole process. I'm thankful for last year, don't get me wrong. Like I've said before - things happen for a reason. I just needed this extra time to get my base training in, get my mind right and get to the inner layers within myself to find out what it is I need to feel when I cross that line.
Monday, October 23, 2006
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
It's been a while.
Since I've posted - since I've worked out. It's frustrating. Work is so busy that I haven't had the chance to get much training in. In the last week I've run 12 miles, biked 0 miles and swam 0 meters. I've been unable to leave the office for lunch or even leave to go home at a normal hour. I hate that I'm off track because it's so hard to get going again. I am going to try to ride my bike tonight, I really need the workout and the stress relief. I've been extremely stressed out at work and it's totally affecting my energy level.
In addition to not working out due to long work hours, I tend to eat worse when I'm stuck inside all day. I buy crap from the vending machine and try to make a lunch out of pop tarts and popcorn. ;(
I hope to get back in the groove of working out and doing things for myself again. I miss my training friends, I miss my bike and I miss the feeling of having finished a great workout.
AHhhhhhhhHHHhhhh GEEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzz.
Since I've posted - since I've worked out. It's frustrating. Work is so busy that I haven't had the chance to get much training in. In the last week I've run 12 miles, biked 0 miles and swam 0 meters. I've been unable to leave the office for lunch or even leave to go home at a normal hour. I hate that I'm off track because it's so hard to get going again. I am going to try to ride my bike tonight, I really need the workout and the stress relief. I've been extremely stressed out at work and it's totally affecting my energy level.
In addition to not working out due to long work hours, I tend to eat worse when I'm stuck inside all day. I buy crap from the vending machine and try to make a lunch out of pop tarts and popcorn. ;(
I hope to get back in the groove of working out and doing things for myself again. I miss my training friends, I miss my bike and I miss the feeling of having finished a great workout.
AHhhhhhhhHHHhhhh GEEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzz.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
New Month, New Training Plan(s)
I haven't posted anything since my Degray Lake post-race celebration. I've been enjoying some much needed time off. Mind you - I didn't take completely "off" from training, I just took it easy. If I didn't feel like riding, I just didn't. I caught up with some friends, ate terribly, went out for drinks one night and just took care of some home stuff. It felt pretty good and by the time last weekend got here, I was ready to start with it again. That's the thing I need to remember, when I get burned out I need to just step back and relax. Everything will come back in time. Of course I need to make sure I know the difference between being burned out versus just being tired.....
Anywho... it's a new month and I've got a new plan. Or set of plans! I have my training schedule from my new coach and I've got my strength training schedule / plan. I started the month out by doing a bike time trial on Saturday, it was pretty cool. I haven't done a TT in so long. I felt pretty strong then we did a recovery ride afterwards to loosen up the legs. Later that day I took a big ol' power nap. Since I napped, I didn't eat lunch and I didn't wake up until 4:30 and it was too late to eat then because dinner would be ruined. Well, that made for a tough run on Sunday. I was really tired and just didn't have the energy or the drive to run long. I only ran for 55:00 or so.... I had to walk a couple of times too because I was so tired. I know it was a nutritional mistake because I wasn't hurting, I was breathing fine and I had plenty to drink. I just didn't have any calories in me from the day before and I didn't eat breakfast before the run.
Monday was Labor Day, it rained and I took the day off. Yesterday I did my first strength training session with Michael. It was tough too! It's funny how you can feel like you're so in shape / strong when it comes to running and biking, etc. but when it comes to this strength training and weights, I'm so out of shape! I was so weak and out of breath. It was kind of embarassing because I was sweating so much and my coordination wasn't the best. I started to feel the soreness setting in last night! Today = HOLY CRAP, my legs are killing me. I got up this morning to run and it hurt so bad to walk down the steps in my garage to get to the car!! I went to the lake and ran and the legs loosened up, which was good. I just can't believe how sore I am - and I'm supposed to do the strength training session again tomorrow, YIKES!
This month is going to be hard simply because I have a new training plan (which includes more running) and I have this strength training stuff that I started as well. I really want to get strong and train to be more efficient. I'm hoping by getting a jump start on my "off season" training that it will make next year a lot better. Training for the Ironman isn't going to be easy even though it is the second time around. I just need to make sure I focus on training smart and staying injury free.
I haven't posted anything since my Degray Lake post-race celebration. I've been enjoying some much needed time off. Mind you - I didn't take completely "off" from training, I just took it easy. If I didn't feel like riding, I just didn't. I caught up with some friends, ate terribly, went out for drinks one night and just took care of some home stuff. It felt pretty good and by the time last weekend got here, I was ready to start with it again. That's the thing I need to remember, when I get burned out I need to just step back and relax. Everything will come back in time. Of course I need to make sure I know the difference between being burned out versus just being tired.....
Anywho... it's a new month and I've got a new plan. Or set of plans! I have my training schedule from my new coach and I've got my strength training schedule / plan. I started the month out by doing a bike time trial on Saturday, it was pretty cool. I haven't done a TT in so long. I felt pretty strong then we did a recovery ride afterwards to loosen up the legs. Later that day I took a big ol' power nap. Since I napped, I didn't eat lunch and I didn't wake up until 4:30 and it was too late to eat then because dinner would be ruined. Well, that made for a tough run on Sunday. I was really tired and just didn't have the energy or the drive to run long. I only ran for 55:00 or so.... I had to walk a couple of times too because I was so tired. I know it was a nutritional mistake because I wasn't hurting, I was breathing fine and I had plenty to drink. I just didn't have any calories in me from the day before and I didn't eat breakfast before the run.
Monday was Labor Day, it rained and I took the day off. Yesterday I did my first strength training session with Michael. It was tough too! It's funny how you can feel like you're so in shape / strong when it comes to running and biking, etc. but when it comes to this strength training and weights, I'm so out of shape! I was so weak and out of breath. It was kind of embarassing because I was sweating so much and my coordination wasn't the best. I started to feel the soreness setting in last night! Today = HOLY CRAP, my legs are killing me. I got up this morning to run and it hurt so bad to walk down the steps in my garage to get to the car!! I went to the lake and ran and the legs loosened up, which was good. I just can't believe how sore I am - and I'm supposed to do the strength training session again tomorrow, YIKES!
This month is going to be hard simply because I have a new training plan (which includes more running) and I have this strength training stuff that I started as well. I really want to get strong and train to be more efficient. I'm hoping by getting a jump start on my "off season" training that it will make next year a lot better. Training for the Ironman isn't going to be easy even though it is the second time around. I just need to make sure I focus on training smart and staying injury free.
Sunday, August 20, 2006
It's a wrap.
Woo Hoo! I am officially "done" with the 2006 triathlon season. It's been a long year, a good year - but long. I was really looking forward to getting through this last race so I could take some much needed time off. In fact, I was planning on riding the HHH100 next weekend, but you know what? I don't think so! The only reason I was going to do that is so I could get 100 miles in... and why? So I could do that before I take time off? What's the point?
We just got home from Arkansas, did the Degray Lake Iron Mountain Man / Half IM distance race. Damn, was that hard?! It was H-O-T!! I felt really good during the swim and bike (even rode conservatively) but when it came to the run... that was a different story. Big surprise, right? I'm just not a good runner. I'm really not a good runner when it's a ka-jillion degrees outside. It took the first four miles to get my legs under me. It really took everything I had not to quit. I felt SO BAD those first few miles. It totally sucked. I walked so much. My head was killing me, my foot was cramping - it was hot. WAAAHHHHH!!!!!
I kept telling myself that it was my last race, let's finish this with a bang. Don't DNF the last race.... you'll have that to think about for the rest of the year.... Somehow, things just came together for me. I started feeling good, could have been those oranges I ate at one of the aid stations. Whatever it was, it worked. The second loop of the run was pretty damn good! I finished strong and actually placed 1st in my age group. Of course there were only like five people total in my AG, but hey, I'll take the win!! I can't control who shows up to these races, right? Gimme my trophy! :)
This morning I got up and went back to the race site, I did a relay for the sprint triathlon. Lucky me, I only had to do the swim! I got in the water early, had to stretch it out.... I'm so glad I did, too. My body was sooooo stiff. I had a pretty good swim and it was really fun to see all the people out there doing the race. Lots of newbies, which is always great. I really love to see people getting into this sport.
All in all, had a good weekend, feel good about the race season and feel even better that it's over! What am I going to do with my free time? HA! I'm not quitting, people!! I'm just going to take it easy for a couple of weeks before I get on the Ironman training wagon. I'll start my weight / strength training this week or next and start working on technique and skills to help me next year. But for now, it's time to recharge!
:)
Woo Hoo! I am officially "done" with the 2006 triathlon season. It's been a long year, a good year - but long. I was really looking forward to getting through this last race so I could take some much needed time off. In fact, I was planning on riding the HHH100 next weekend, but you know what? I don't think so! The only reason I was going to do that is so I could get 100 miles in... and why? So I could do that before I take time off? What's the point?
We just got home from Arkansas, did the Degray Lake Iron Mountain Man / Half IM distance race. Damn, was that hard?! It was H-O-T!! I felt really good during the swim and bike (even rode conservatively) but when it came to the run... that was a different story. Big surprise, right? I'm just not a good runner. I'm really not a good runner when it's a ka-jillion degrees outside. It took the first four miles to get my legs under me. It really took everything I had not to quit. I felt SO BAD those first few miles. It totally sucked. I walked so much. My head was killing me, my foot was cramping - it was hot. WAAAHHHHH!!!!!
I kept telling myself that it was my last race, let's finish this with a bang. Don't DNF the last race.... you'll have that to think about for the rest of the year.... Somehow, things just came together for me. I started feeling good, could have been those oranges I ate at one of the aid stations. Whatever it was, it worked. The second loop of the run was pretty damn good! I finished strong and actually placed 1st in my age group. Of course there were only like five people total in my AG, but hey, I'll take the win!! I can't control who shows up to these races, right? Gimme my trophy! :)
This morning I got up and went back to the race site, I did a relay for the sprint triathlon. Lucky me, I only had to do the swim! I got in the water early, had to stretch it out.... I'm so glad I did, too. My body was sooooo stiff. I had a pretty good swim and it was really fun to see all the people out there doing the race. Lots of newbies, which is always great. I really love to see people getting into this sport.
All in all, had a good weekend, feel good about the race season and feel even better that it's over! What am I going to do with my free time? HA! I'm not quitting, people!! I'm just going to take it easy for a couple of weeks before I get on the Ironman training wagon. I'll start my weight / strength training this week or next and start working on technique and skills to help me next year. But for now, it's time to recharge!
:)
Monday, August 14, 2006
Less than a week.
Five days actually, before the Degray Half. Am I prepared? Not really. Am I excited? Not so much. Am I scared? Kind of! Why am I doing it? Good question. I want to see where I am with a longer race. I am using this as a gauge for my Ironman training. Is that sick or what? Well, at least I got a free entry!!
I am just tired of training. It's also been HOT as SHIT in Dallas. Who wants to train at the ass crack 'o' dawn every morning? If you don't you can feel the heat coming up from the ground and I swear, if I run any slower my shoes will literally melt to the pavement!! Imagine what it's like when you step in a big pile of chewed bubble gum.... that's what my shoes would look like if I ran after work! I haven't been swimming as much as I'd like. Let's face it, I haven't been taking this race seriously. I decided it would be a training day, and well that was it. If I didn't feel like swimming - I just didn't! This may bite me in the ass on Saturday.... I'm a little nervous. I did go to the pool today and the thought entered my head "what if I had to DNF during the swim?!!" Oh geez, I can get through this. It just seems funny that I haven't been too worried about this race. I remember when I trained for my first and second halves.... I really focused on my workouts, my peak weekend and my taper. I've kind of made up my own training schedule (which of course fluctuates based on how tired / bored I get), but now I'm just kind of winging it. Again, training day. I just need to keep telling myself that. Training day, training day, training day. Long training day.
So, I've got the rest of the week - then race day. Then the next weekend is HHH100. Then I get to rest!! Woo HOOOOO!! Party time!! I can NOT wait to take some serious time off. I need a break. I am thinking about taking some time off work too. Just to spend quality time at home getting my stuff in order. I'm just burned out on everything right now. Work has been extrememly busy and stressful for the past couple of weeks. I knew it would be - I just didn't expect to feel so down in the dumps. Literally, I've felt like I could just start crying at work for the past several days. I just need to get through this busy time. It doesn't seem to ever be at the right times - if I'm busy at work it just happens to coincide with a busy training schedule - then something has to give. Why can't I have the busy work week when I'm not training for a race?? Why can't I be near my peak training when work is slow? Oh yeah, Murphy's Law. Right.
It doesn't matter anyways. Who cares how long it takes me to finish the race? At least I'm doing them, dammit. Too bad I spent a small fortune for my bike though. That alone makes me feel like I really should try! Why would I invest in a piece of equipment, then not use it to it's full potential? Poor LeTigre. He needs to run fast. I'm going to work the bike this weekend. I love my LeTigre. I just hope me and LeTigre click next year! I guess we hadn't established a good relationship during the Ironman training this time around. With the multiple chain breaks, then the dreaded crash. I thought LeTigre was a lemon. Maybe he just needs to be tamed.
Okay - this is really going off the deep end....
Need to get rest. This is the taper week, less is more when it comes to workouts, quality not quantity. BUT - more is more when it comes to sleep. and I need some!
night night, little tiger.
Five days actually, before the Degray Half. Am I prepared? Not really. Am I excited? Not so much. Am I scared? Kind of! Why am I doing it? Good question. I want to see where I am with a longer race. I am using this as a gauge for my Ironman training. Is that sick or what? Well, at least I got a free entry!!
I am just tired of training. It's also been HOT as SHIT in Dallas. Who wants to train at the ass crack 'o' dawn every morning? If you don't you can feel the heat coming up from the ground and I swear, if I run any slower my shoes will literally melt to the pavement!! Imagine what it's like when you step in a big pile of chewed bubble gum.... that's what my shoes would look like if I ran after work! I haven't been swimming as much as I'd like. Let's face it, I haven't been taking this race seriously. I decided it would be a training day, and well that was it. If I didn't feel like swimming - I just didn't! This may bite me in the ass on Saturday.... I'm a little nervous. I did go to the pool today and the thought entered my head "what if I had to DNF during the swim?!!" Oh geez, I can get through this. It just seems funny that I haven't been too worried about this race. I remember when I trained for my first and second halves.... I really focused on my workouts, my peak weekend and my taper. I've kind of made up my own training schedule (which of course fluctuates based on how tired / bored I get), but now I'm just kind of winging it. Again, training day. I just need to keep telling myself that. Training day, training day, training day. Long training day.
So, I've got the rest of the week - then race day. Then the next weekend is HHH100. Then I get to rest!! Woo HOOOOO!! Party time!! I can NOT wait to take some serious time off. I need a break. I am thinking about taking some time off work too. Just to spend quality time at home getting my stuff in order. I'm just burned out on everything right now. Work has been extrememly busy and stressful for the past couple of weeks. I knew it would be - I just didn't expect to feel so down in the dumps. Literally, I've felt like I could just start crying at work for the past several days. I just need to get through this busy time. It doesn't seem to ever be at the right times - if I'm busy at work it just happens to coincide with a busy training schedule - then something has to give. Why can't I have the busy work week when I'm not training for a race?? Why can't I be near my peak training when work is slow? Oh yeah, Murphy's Law. Right.
It doesn't matter anyways. Who cares how long it takes me to finish the race? At least I'm doing them, dammit. Too bad I spent a small fortune for my bike though. That alone makes me feel like I really should try! Why would I invest in a piece of equipment, then not use it to it's full potential? Poor LeTigre. He needs to run fast. I'm going to work the bike this weekend. I love my LeTigre. I just hope me and LeTigre click next year! I guess we hadn't established a good relationship during the Ironman training this time around. With the multiple chain breaks, then the dreaded crash. I thought LeTigre was a lemon. Maybe he just needs to be tamed.
Okay - this is really going off the deep end....
Need to get rest. This is the taper week, less is more when it comes to workouts, quality not quantity. BUT - more is more when it comes to sleep. and I need some!
night night, little tiger.
Sunday, August 06, 2006
Good Weekend of workouts....
Friday = Off - was tired from a very busy and stressful week of work, needed the rest.
Saturday = rode 40 miles. This was a short ride and it felt super easy. It was nice to be done with a workout so quickly! I rode w/ Stephanie and it was a great, relaxing ride. Later I got a much needed massage. My legs and butt were SO SORE from my three workouts on Wednesday (early morning run, resistance test / training at Baylor, hill ride in the evening) followed up by a challenging run on Thursday morning which included guess what? More hills! The massage felt good plus Donald always stretches my legs out too, which is most helpful.
Sunday = 13 mile run. I actually felt really good on this run. I was expecting the last couple of miles to hurt but I was fine. I have been taking more endurolytes lately, and I think this is really helping on the longer bike rides and runs during this crazy ass heat.
I'm two weeks out from the Degray half. I'm going into this purely as a training day, not a racing day. I just need to see where I am physically and mentally for a longer event. This should be a good check point for me. Whatever my problems are during the race, I'll have plenty of time to address and work on them for the next year in my Ironman preparations. I just hope that it's not a total disaster! A year isn't THAT long!!
For now, I'm feeling pretty good about training, I'm not completely burned out but I'm getting antzy for some time off!! I've got Degray, then Hotter 'n' Hell - then we're done for a while! Woooooo Hooooooo!!!! I can work on the house! I can get a pedicure that will last longer than one week!
happy training.
Friday = Off - was tired from a very busy and stressful week of work, needed the rest.
Saturday = rode 40 miles. This was a short ride and it felt super easy. It was nice to be done with a workout so quickly! I rode w/ Stephanie and it was a great, relaxing ride. Later I got a much needed massage. My legs and butt were SO SORE from my three workouts on Wednesday (early morning run, resistance test / training at Baylor, hill ride in the evening) followed up by a challenging run on Thursday morning which included guess what? More hills! The massage felt good plus Donald always stretches my legs out too, which is most helpful.
Sunday = 13 mile run. I actually felt really good on this run. I was expecting the last couple of miles to hurt but I was fine. I have been taking more endurolytes lately, and I think this is really helping on the longer bike rides and runs during this crazy ass heat.
I'm two weeks out from the Degray half. I'm going into this purely as a training day, not a racing day. I just need to see where I am physically and mentally for a longer event. This should be a good check point for me. Whatever my problems are during the race, I'll have plenty of time to address and work on them for the next year in my Ironman preparations. I just hope that it's not a total disaster! A year isn't THAT long!!
For now, I'm feeling pretty good about training, I'm not completely burned out but I'm getting antzy for some time off!! I've got Degray, then Hotter 'n' Hell - then we're done for a while! Woooooo Hooooooo!!!! I can work on the house! I can get a pedicure that will last longer than one week!
happy training.
Friday, July 28, 2006
Respect.
I may have completely lost any amount of respect that I had from my coworkers today. The creative department at my office (I'm in advertising, there's the "account team" and "creative team") all went out for a little "retreat" or team bonding or whatever you want to call it. We took the entire day off work and drove up to Lake Texoma to have some fun. Texoma is about an hour and a half north of Dallas. Me and a coworker rode together and we get there a little early. We're the first ones there... I'm a little excited because I love the lake! I love to ski and just relax by the water. The boat we were going to be spending the afternoon on was super nice - it had two bedrooms! I've never been on a boat this big before. Definitely not made for skiing but more for relaxing.
We're waiting for the others to arrive and the whole time I'm sitting on this boat in the slip at the dock and thinking "maybe I should get in and do a quick OWS workout". The water was nice and calm and not too hot. 20 minutes goes by and we're still waiting on the stragglers. I'm getting a little anxious. I don't sit and wait very well. If I'm at a lake I'm supposed to be riding on a boat or skiing - or swimming dammit!!
Finally everyone arrives, we all head out to this cove with a sandy beach area. We set up a picnic area and we're ready to chill. Even have a couple of coolers of beer. I don't want to be a total dud, so I have a beer. I'm still thinking about how calm the water is. I brought my swim suit, cap and goggles just in case I had time for a swim... I just couldn't take any longer. I suited up and got ready to go. I was embarrased because I thought my coworkers would think I'm a big ol' dork. You know, they don't understand us crazy triathletes. I decided that it didn't matter and went out anyways. It was a great swim too. I swam for about 25 minutes and got a decent workout in. Not too long though because I was a little self conscious about swimming with my coworkers around!! Luckily it's Friday so by the time Monday morning rolls around maybe they'll forget.
I may have completely lost any amount of respect that I had from my coworkers today. The creative department at my office (I'm in advertising, there's the "account team" and "creative team") all went out for a little "retreat" or team bonding or whatever you want to call it. We took the entire day off work and drove up to Lake Texoma to have some fun. Texoma is about an hour and a half north of Dallas. Me and a coworker rode together and we get there a little early. We're the first ones there... I'm a little excited because I love the lake! I love to ski and just relax by the water. The boat we were going to be spending the afternoon on was super nice - it had two bedrooms! I've never been on a boat this big before. Definitely not made for skiing but more for relaxing.
We're waiting for the others to arrive and the whole time I'm sitting on this boat in the slip at the dock and thinking "maybe I should get in and do a quick OWS workout". The water was nice and calm and not too hot. 20 minutes goes by and we're still waiting on the stragglers. I'm getting a little anxious. I don't sit and wait very well. If I'm at a lake I'm supposed to be riding on a boat or skiing - or swimming dammit!!
Finally everyone arrives, we all head out to this cove with a sandy beach area. We set up a picnic area and we're ready to chill. Even have a couple of coolers of beer. I don't want to be a total dud, so I have a beer. I'm still thinking about how calm the water is. I brought my swim suit, cap and goggles just in case I had time for a swim... I just couldn't take any longer. I suited up and got ready to go. I was embarrased because I thought my coworkers would think I'm a big ol' dork. You know, they don't understand us crazy triathletes. I decided that it didn't matter and went out anyways. It was a great swim too. I swam for about 25 minutes and got a decent workout in. Not too long though because I was a little self conscious about swimming with my coworkers around!! Luckily it's Friday so by the time Monday morning rolls around maybe they'll forget.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Feeling good again.
So last week I was down with the bronchitis "funk", I think I've about shaken it completely. I've had some good workouts since my last post and I'm feeling pretty good. Saturday I rode 60 miles - went out to Seagoville. It was a good tempo ride, I didnt' get dropped until the three hills on Lawson!
Sunday morning I had a little race, I did the Irongirl triathlon in Las Colinas. That was actually a lot of fun. It's good to do these small races to remind myself of why I train all the time. I train because I really do enjoy the sport of triathlon - and participating in the race on Sunday was definitely enjoyable! It was so cute because there were so many "newbies" and they were talking about getting through the race, etc. I can totally remember when I was in their shoes. Just not knowing what to expect was nerve wracking. The Irongirl event was the first all women's race I've ever participated in. I just thought the whole atomosphere was fun, it really catered to the women and they seemed to focus on all the first time / newer triathletes. It was great to be a part of it. Not to mention I felt like I had a decent race considering I rode long the day before and went out the night before!!
I've swam once and run once since the race, and both workouts were fine - I'm trying to get a little bit longer run in on Tuesday mornings before work (min. 6 miles as opposed to the 4-5 I usually squeeze in). If I can get up earlier on Thursday mornings I could get a little extra mileage in there too. Uggh, the thought of getting up even earlier though.....
Degray is coming up in just a few more weeks, I've got a pretty long weekend ahead of me then next week we're off to Austin for the Muddy Buddy. I've decided just to use Degray as a training day. I'll work on my nutrition and endurance and use it for some valuable training. I don't feel like I gave myself enough time to really plan out a good training schedule for Degray, so we'll just use it as a building block for Ironman next year.
Other than that - looks like we're set for Hotter n' Hell then hopefully I'll get a little break. That's the thing about training for 3 sports, you're always working on something. If I don't get enough riding in, my bike split goes downhill, same on the running and swimming. It's hard to keep them all going in order to get better at each discipline! And lord knows - I need to improve in all areas.
So last week I was down with the bronchitis "funk", I think I've about shaken it completely. I've had some good workouts since my last post and I'm feeling pretty good. Saturday I rode 60 miles - went out to Seagoville. It was a good tempo ride, I didnt' get dropped until the three hills on Lawson!
Sunday morning I had a little race, I did the Irongirl triathlon in Las Colinas. That was actually a lot of fun. It's good to do these small races to remind myself of why I train all the time. I train because I really do enjoy the sport of triathlon - and participating in the race on Sunday was definitely enjoyable! It was so cute because there were so many "newbies" and they were talking about getting through the race, etc. I can totally remember when I was in their shoes. Just not knowing what to expect was nerve wracking. The Irongirl event was the first all women's race I've ever participated in. I just thought the whole atomosphere was fun, it really catered to the women and they seemed to focus on all the first time / newer triathletes. It was great to be a part of it. Not to mention I felt like I had a decent race considering I rode long the day before and went out the night before!!
I've swam once and run once since the race, and both workouts were fine - I'm trying to get a little bit longer run in on Tuesday mornings before work (min. 6 miles as opposed to the 4-5 I usually squeeze in). If I can get up earlier on Thursday mornings I could get a little extra mileage in there too. Uggh, the thought of getting up even earlier though.....
Degray is coming up in just a few more weeks, I've got a pretty long weekend ahead of me then next week we're off to Austin for the Muddy Buddy. I've decided just to use Degray as a training day. I'll work on my nutrition and endurance and use it for some valuable training. I don't feel like I gave myself enough time to really plan out a good training schedule for Degray, so we'll just use it as a building block for Ironman next year.
Other than that - looks like we're set for Hotter n' Hell then hopefully I'll get a little break. That's the thing about training for 3 sports, you're always working on something. If I don't get enough riding in, my bike split goes downhill, same on the running and swimming. It's hard to keep them all going in order to get better at each discipline! And lord knows - I need to improve in all areas.
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Derailed.
That's the current status of my training. I was in my groove, making all my workouts then I came down with bronchitis. I had to take an entire week off from training, because I was feeling so shitty. Last night I went out to the lake to do the "muddy buddy" workout where we run/bike/run/bike/run/bike.... until we make it all the way around the lake. It was hotter than hell out there and my workout completely sucked. I barely ran at all because my chest was killing me. Now I have absolutely no desire to go out and run again. I hate when I get in these funks.
I was thinking about running at lunch, but uggggghhhhh, I don't feel like going to the gym and running on the dreadmill. Maybe I'll just skip today and get up early tomorrow to do the Legal Grounds run.... what to do?? I can run early Friday, swim in the afternoon - bike Saturday and a long run on Sunday. Shouldn't be too much for me to handle, right? And Degray is how far away? Or how close is more like it... maybe I should scratch the half and wait to do one early next season. Then what am I left with? Not much in the way of racing.... all that training and nothing to really show for it. BARF.
That's the current status of my training. I was in my groove, making all my workouts then I came down with bronchitis. I had to take an entire week off from training, because I was feeling so shitty. Last night I went out to the lake to do the "muddy buddy" workout where we run/bike/run/bike/run/bike.... until we make it all the way around the lake. It was hotter than hell out there and my workout completely sucked. I barely ran at all because my chest was killing me. Now I have absolutely no desire to go out and run again. I hate when I get in these funks.
I was thinking about running at lunch, but uggggghhhhh, I don't feel like going to the gym and running on the dreadmill. Maybe I'll just skip today and get up early tomorrow to do the Legal Grounds run.... what to do?? I can run early Friday, swim in the afternoon - bike Saturday and a long run on Sunday. Shouldn't be too much for me to handle, right? And Degray is how far away? Or how close is more like it... maybe I should scratch the half and wait to do one early next season. Then what am I left with? Not much in the way of racing.... all that training and nothing to really show for it. BARF.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Coaches for 2007
Okay, so Ironman is literally almost a whole year away, and already all these people who have signed up have already decided on who their coach is going to be.... and for some of them it's not my husband. I don't know why it bothers me that someone would switch from him to the "it guy" just because everyone is using him right now. I know of a couple of people for sure who have been coached by my husband, and they both said the coaching was great, both had great races - yet they're not using him again. I don't get it. I shouldn't care, I really shouldn't. I guess the reason it bothers me is because I feel like we do a lot of stuff for certain people... and they should give back. Coaching is a two way street. If I even hear for a second that they weren't "pushed" or something like that, I'll lose it!
Okay, I just had to get that off my chest. Whew. I feel better. I get a little bothered because I think it hurts my husband's feelings, and he'd never say it does... so, I guess I just feel for him. He most likely wouldn't even take on all these clients anyways, he's got a full time job and he's training for his own race so it's not like he would have the time to do it right anyways. I just don't like the thought of him not being the "go-to" coach for Ironman stuff, because he's a stud. He's proven that he knows how to train for this distance and qualify for Hawaii.... and he's gotten tons of people across the finish line - and have had some qualify for Hawaii themselves. So, he's accomplished.
That's my deal.
Okay, so Ironman is literally almost a whole year away, and already all these people who have signed up have already decided on who their coach is going to be.... and for some of them it's not my husband. I don't know why it bothers me that someone would switch from him to the "it guy" just because everyone is using him right now. I know of a couple of people for sure who have been coached by my husband, and they both said the coaching was great, both had great races - yet they're not using him again. I don't get it. I shouldn't care, I really shouldn't. I guess the reason it bothers me is because I feel like we do a lot of stuff for certain people... and they should give back. Coaching is a two way street. If I even hear for a second that they weren't "pushed" or something like that, I'll lose it!
Okay, I just had to get that off my chest. Whew. I feel better. I get a little bothered because I think it hurts my husband's feelings, and he'd never say it does... so, I guess I just feel for him. He most likely wouldn't even take on all these clients anyways, he's got a full time job and he's training for his own race so it's not like he would have the time to do it right anyways. I just don't like the thought of him not being the "go-to" coach for Ironman stuff, because he's a stud. He's proven that he knows how to train for this distance and qualify for Hawaii.... and he's gotten tons of people across the finish line - and have had some qualify for Hawaii themselves. So, he's accomplished.
That's my deal.
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Today I'm soooooo tired. I need energy. I have already had my daily dose of caffeine + more! I woke up sleepy so when I went to Starbucks I ordered a triple venti latte. I added a shot and increased the size, hoping that would give me the energy to make it all day at work. Went to lunch, had water to drink w/ my meal.... picked up some chocolate (there's caffeine in there) and came back to work. It's freakin' 4:00 and I can not, CAN NOT keep my eyes open.
In fact, I was just taking it easy in a conference room and dozed off. I can't be sleeping at work. I just have to get to bed earlier. The heat + training is wearing me out. I think I may have to head out for another coffee beverage. All these calories, just to keep me awake? Isn't there another solution?! Oh yeah, I guess I already mentioned it = sleep.
In fact, I was just taking it easy in a conference room and dozed off. I can't be sleeping at work. I just have to get to bed earlier. The heat + training is wearing me out. I think I may have to head out for another coffee beverage. All these calories, just to keep me awake? Isn't there another solution?! Oh yeah, I guess I already mentioned it = sleep.
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Coeur d'Alene 2007
That's the new plan. I'm signed up and ready to go. Again. I've got a whole new attitude towards training (maybe it's because it's soooo far away still). NO! That's not it - it's because I went to watch all my friends do the race this year and for the first time ever I got emotional watching an Ironman.
It was really enjoyable being in CDA. Brian and I decided that if we were going to go, we were going to make a vacation out of it. We didn't want to get all caught up in the Ironman hooplah - we were going to have some fun, dammit!
I got up Thursday morning and swam the course with my IM buddies. DAMN, that water was COLD. I'm talking freezing. Like painfully cold. I had a full wetsuit on - and it took my breath away. Not to mention my face hurt when I began to swim. I actually started swimming out to the first buoy, stopped and thought to myself "why am I doing this?, I'm not doing the race this year". I turned around to head back to shore while thinking - "C'mon Adrian, this is why you're not an Ironman = you're a wimp". SO, I turned around again and swam one loop of the course. It was hard - because of the water temp, but I felt good. Later that day Brian, William and I had lunch with the gang and went to check out the town. Just as we remembered, very cute and the weather couldn't be better. Friday night some of us went to dinner at this place called Cedars Restaurant. It was nice - a little more upscale than the regular places in town. Strangest thing - a few of the guys at our table recognize this man at the table next to us. It's John Elway. How cool is that? Really, really cool if you're my husband. He was really excited! He even asked if he and Will could get a photo with the hall-of-famer. That has to be one of the highlights of the trip!
Friday Brian went mountain biking with another one of our friends that came up to watch, so it was me and Will. We picked up the IM people and drove the bike course. Looked a little tougher that what I'd expected. All was well until Will decided to barf in the car. Oooohhhhh Yeahhh! We quickly pulled over, stripped him down, put on fresh clothes and went on our way. My friends in the car got to enjoy a little piece of the "heaven" I experience from time to time! It wasnt' really that bad - but I'm used to it, especially since the Little Guy barfed about three time on the plane on our way to Idaho. YUMMY.
Saturday I slept in, Brian and Will went hiking. Later on I got a massage at the resort, which was awesome. The resort is sooo nice! We pretty much took it easy since Sunday was going to be a long day.
Sunday morning I got up at 4:45 to take all the IM people down to the race start. They still had 2 hours before the gun went off, but everyone was out there - I guess they couldn't sleep. You could see the nervousness / anxiousness in their eyes. Soon though, they'd settle down and be in motion. I hung out and took pictures as they were preparing to start their big day. I also got a good place on the beach to get pictures of them coming out of the water from their first loop. As they were finishing the swim, I went back to the hotel to pick up Brian and LG. We made it back into town to see a lot of them on the bike. I went for a run, I ran one loop of the run course and I was able to see all the bikers as they came through. First all the pro women, then my friends. The run course seemed very easy, pretty flat and had a great view of the lake. The only thing is that it was heating up and there wasn't much shade. Once you ran through the neighborhood and got out to CDA Lake Rd, it was HOT! I knew that by the time the athletes got out there, they were going to be struggling. The temps were expected to be 95! After the run we had lunch and watched everyone come in off the bike and head out on the run. It was really fun to see and cheer them on. I really hope we made a little bit of a difference!
We watched all day long - as the first finishers were coming in, you could hear the crowd getting fired up! I walked over to see some of them and I witnessed the sweetest thing. This man ran up to his wife, kissed her on the cheek and grabbed his son. He carried him across the finish line. I got a little choked up! I guess it's the whole "motherly thing" that kicked in... That wasn't the only time I cried... as my friends started finishing, I got sad because I was supposed to be out there, I was supposed to hear people clapping for me too! I was sick of being a spectator! This was Ironman #4 for me to support and watch... The great thing was that I had hoped that it would fuel my drive to train for it again. I felt the passion within that told me I have to be there next year. I want to hear the words "Adrian Hasenbauer, you are an Ironman"!
That's the new plan. I'm signed up and ready to go. Again. I've got a whole new attitude towards training (maybe it's because it's soooo far away still). NO! That's not it - it's because I went to watch all my friends do the race this year and for the first time ever I got emotional watching an Ironman.
It was really enjoyable being in CDA. Brian and I decided that if we were going to go, we were going to make a vacation out of it. We didn't want to get all caught up in the Ironman hooplah - we were going to have some fun, dammit!
I got up Thursday morning and swam the course with my IM buddies. DAMN, that water was COLD. I'm talking freezing. Like painfully cold. I had a full wetsuit on - and it took my breath away. Not to mention my face hurt when I began to swim. I actually started swimming out to the first buoy, stopped and thought to myself "why am I doing this?, I'm not doing the race this year". I turned around to head back to shore while thinking - "C'mon Adrian, this is why you're not an Ironman = you're a wimp". SO, I turned around again and swam one loop of the course. It was hard - because of the water temp, but I felt good. Later that day Brian, William and I had lunch with the gang and went to check out the town. Just as we remembered, very cute and the weather couldn't be better. Friday night some of us went to dinner at this place called Cedars Restaurant. It was nice - a little more upscale than the regular places in town. Strangest thing - a few of the guys at our table recognize this man at the table next to us. It's John Elway. How cool is that? Really, really cool if you're my husband. He was really excited! He even asked if he and Will could get a photo with the hall-of-famer. That has to be one of the highlights of the trip!
Friday Brian went mountain biking with another one of our friends that came up to watch, so it was me and Will. We picked up the IM people and drove the bike course. Looked a little tougher that what I'd expected. All was well until Will decided to barf in the car. Oooohhhhh Yeahhh! We quickly pulled over, stripped him down, put on fresh clothes and went on our way. My friends in the car got to enjoy a little piece of the "heaven" I experience from time to time! It wasnt' really that bad - but I'm used to it, especially since the Little Guy barfed about three time on the plane on our way to Idaho. YUMMY.
Saturday I slept in, Brian and Will went hiking. Later on I got a massage at the resort, which was awesome. The resort is sooo nice! We pretty much took it easy since Sunday was going to be a long day.
Sunday morning I got up at 4:45 to take all the IM people down to the race start. They still had 2 hours before the gun went off, but everyone was out there - I guess they couldn't sleep. You could see the nervousness / anxiousness in their eyes. Soon though, they'd settle down and be in motion. I hung out and took pictures as they were preparing to start their big day. I also got a good place on the beach to get pictures of them coming out of the water from their first loop. As they were finishing the swim, I went back to the hotel to pick up Brian and LG. We made it back into town to see a lot of them on the bike. I went for a run, I ran one loop of the run course and I was able to see all the bikers as they came through. First all the pro women, then my friends. The run course seemed very easy, pretty flat and had a great view of the lake. The only thing is that it was heating up and there wasn't much shade. Once you ran through the neighborhood and got out to CDA Lake Rd, it was HOT! I knew that by the time the athletes got out there, they were going to be struggling. The temps were expected to be 95! After the run we had lunch and watched everyone come in off the bike and head out on the run. It was really fun to see and cheer them on. I really hope we made a little bit of a difference!
We watched all day long - as the first finishers were coming in, you could hear the crowd getting fired up! I walked over to see some of them and I witnessed the sweetest thing. This man ran up to his wife, kissed her on the cheek and grabbed his son. He carried him across the finish line. I got a little choked up! I guess it's the whole "motherly thing" that kicked in... That wasn't the only time I cried... as my friends started finishing, I got sad because I was supposed to be out there, I was supposed to hear people clapping for me too! I was sick of being a spectator! This was Ironman #4 for me to support and watch... The great thing was that I had hoped that it would fuel my drive to train for it again. I felt the passion within that told me I have to be there next year. I want to hear the words "Adrian Hasenbauer, you are an Ironman"!
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Motivation
Where has it gone? I'm having a really hard time with motivation these days. I am bummed that I'm not doing Ironman and I feel like I don't have anything to train for. My friends are all training hard for the race and I'm out. I'm not a part of the whole thing anymore. I don't have a place. We spent the Memorial Day weekend in Mena, Arkansas training. Well, the Ironman people were training while I was just trying to get in some good workouts. Of course I didn't ride even half as long as anyone else... and I just felt like a loser. A quitter.
It's been a rough few weeks - with the bike wreck and having to drop out of the race that I've been training for so long for... then my Mom having a stroke... and I just have a lot of stress. When stressful things happen, I start thinking that everything in my life is jacked up. I question whether or not I have a solid marriage, I wonder if my husband still loves me, I think that I'm fat and ugly and out of shape and I don't think I'm a good mother. This was all going on in Arkansas - I didn't really have a good time because I'm in a funky place right now. I feel like I don't really have any friends. I need to find friends with kids that I can hang out with - that can understand the challenges of motherhood. The thing about Arkansas is that we brought William with us and the car trip was long. It's really hard on the little guy to sit in a car seat for 5 hours. I try to entertain him and I hold him and play with him... and that's really hard too. Then you don't really get much rest in a hotel room with a baby... and you have to get up a the ass-crack of dawn to train. When will we learn? We just can't keep doing this. We experienced this same thing in Fredericksburg. Nobody understands the difficulty of a long drive - no sleep and tough workouts. And don't even think about a nap.
This is where the frustration lies.... we spend all our holiday weekends and vacation time training - or trying to train. When can we just be normal and have fun? Don't get me wrong, I like riding my bike and swimming and running - but I want to enjoy it again. I want to have fun while training, right now it's a chore. It's work. I work to earn money for my family and so that I can enjoy my time off. When my time off feels like work - there's a problem. Unfortunately, this past trip was a lot of work. We (Brian and I) were the SAG wagon for the training group. The group had a 100 mile ride in the Oachita mountains and there are no stores to rehydrate / refuel. We loaded up the car with water, gatorade, food and everyone's "special needs"... As everyone rode, we would pull over and let them fill up and eat, etc. Literally for the entire 6.5 hours of the ride. There was one point when I had to go put gas in the car... it was a bit of a drive and once I got to the small town, I had to let William get out of the car and stretch his legs, etc. By the time I started heading back up the mountain my phone was ringing.... people needed fluids. I was racing to get to everyone, and once I did - they were almost frustrated that they had to wait on me. I heard over and over "I'm out of water, totally out". I felt bad that they ran out - but geez, I had to get gas, take care of my son and everyone was pretty spread out along the ride. It's a thankless job - and what was I getting out of it? Did anyone think that it was enjoyable to be in the car for that long? With a small child? Was there any benefit what-so-ever for me to be doing this for them? Not that everything has to benefit me, but this was a very selfless act.
I want a vacation. A full on vacation where I can lay on the beach and read and be lazy - and have normal tan lines! I want to have fun again... this is the exact same feeling I had when we came home from Hell Week. Maybe this time I'll learn - it would be best to just stay home.
Where has it gone? I'm having a really hard time with motivation these days. I am bummed that I'm not doing Ironman and I feel like I don't have anything to train for. My friends are all training hard for the race and I'm out. I'm not a part of the whole thing anymore. I don't have a place. We spent the Memorial Day weekend in Mena, Arkansas training. Well, the Ironman people were training while I was just trying to get in some good workouts. Of course I didn't ride even half as long as anyone else... and I just felt like a loser. A quitter.
It's been a rough few weeks - with the bike wreck and having to drop out of the race that I've been training for so long for... then my Mom having a stroke... and I just have a lot of stress. When stressful things happen, I start thinking that everything in my life is jacked up. I question whether or not I have a solid marriage, I wonder if my husband still loves me, I think that I'm fat and ugly and out of shape and I don't think I'm a good mother. This was all going on in Arkansas - I didn't really have a good time because I'm in a funky place right now. I feel like I don't really have any friends. I need to find friends with kids that I can hang out with - that can understand the challenges of motherhood. The thing about Arkansas is that we brought William with us and the car trip was long. It's really hard on the little guy to sit in a car seat for 5 hours. I try to entertain him and I hold him and play with him... and that's really hard too. Then you don't really get much rest in a hotel room with a baby... and you have to get up a the ass-crack of dawn to train. When will we learn? We just can't keep doing this. We experienced this same thing in Fredericksburg. Nobody understands the difficulty of a long drive - no sleep and tough workouts. And don't even think about a nap.
This is where the frustration lies.... we spend all our holiday weekends and vacation time training - or trying to train. When can we just be normal and have fun? Don't get me wrong, I like riding my bike and swimming and running - but I want to enjoy it again. I want to have fun while training, right now it's a chore. It's work. I work to earn money for my family and so that I can enjoy my time off. When my time off feels like work - there's a problem. Unfortunately, this past trip was a lot of work. We (Brian and I) were the SAG wagon for the training group. The group had a 100 mile ride in the Oachita mountains and there are no stores to rehydrate / refuel. We loaded up the car with water, gatorade, food and everyone's "special needs"... As everyone rode, we would pull over and let them fill up and eat, etc. Literally for the entire 6.5 hours of the ride. There was one point when I had to go put gas in the car... it was a bit of a drive and once I got to the small town, I had to let William get out of the car and stretch his legs, etc. By the time I started heading back up the mountain my phone was ringing.... people needed fluids. I was racing to get to everyone, and once I did - they were almost frustrated that they had to wait on me. I heard over and over "I'm out of water, totally out". I felt bad that they ran out - but geez, I had to get gas, take care of my son and everyone was pretty spread out along the ride. It's a thankless job - and what was I getting out of it? Did anyone think that it was enjoyable to be in the car for that long? With a small child? Was there any benefit what-so-ever for me to be doing this for them? Not that everything has to benefit me, but this was a very selfless act.
I want a vacation. A full on vacation where I can lay on the beach and read and be lazy - and have normal tan lines! I want to have fun again... this is the exact same feeling I had when we came home from Hell Week. Maybe this time I'll learn - it would be best to just stay home.
Monday, May 15, 2006
Bad joo-joo.
So it looks like this is not the year for my inaugural ironman.... last weekend while on a training ride I had a little bike accident. I took a fall and hit my head. I had a pretty bad concussion. I don't remember a thing from the accident. I really don't remember anything from the day at all. I woke up in the Emergency Room at Baylor Hospital. Apparently I was unconscious for a short period of time, but the time I was conscious, I can't remember.
I was having problems that day with my bike seat. My seat post kept sliding down into the frame. It was weird because in my previous training rides, I kept adjusting my seat because I felt like it was too low. I would ride and by the time I finished, I would think to myself "maybe I didn't raise it enough". So before I rode it again, I would raise it up higher... and it would drop down again. It wasn't until last weekend that I actually realized it was a problem with my bike.
There was a pretty big group of us riding together - the Ironman group was planning on riding 80 miles then running afterwards. I was a little upset with my seat situtaion so Brian and I pulled off the group and went to find a hardware store. We needed to find a bolt to keep my seat post from dropping down. We repaired my bike and I went to find the group while Brian started to ride home to let the babysitter go. He turned around to check on me and that's when it happened. He said he thought I was adjusting my shoe or something, and I just crashed. I don't know how fast I was going, I don't know if I hit something that made me lose my balance... who knows. He raced over to take care of me... he said I was bleeding pretty bad so he called 9-1-1 for an ambulance.
My friends that I was riding towards came up to the scene of the accident. From what I was told, it didn't look good. The paramedics loaded me up and off we went. I was in the hospital all day. I didn't have much memory of anything so we weren't able to go home until that started coming back. Poor Brian, he said I asked him the same questions every 20 minutes. Talk about freaky, right? I got 14 stitches in my head and got banged up on the left side of my body. I got a little road rash, but nothing compared to the head injury.
I was feeling dizzy all last week - each day did improve a bit... Monday I was feeling loopy and dizzy and couldn't concentrate much... by Thursday and Friday I was feeling better - but still not 100%. I went to see a neurologist on Thursday morning and he recommended that I stay off my bike and out of the pool for about six weeks. I was a little heart broken because the Ironman is in seven weeks and the most intense training is upon us.... The doctor said that where I suffered the hit was a sensitive place on my head... he explained that I didn't get a concussion like Troy Aikman gets a concussion, but more serious. He said that there is a possibility of having a seizure when I become fatigued. I decided then and there that I would look for a second opinion. I really wanted to do the race.
It was this last weekend that really made me change my mind. After thinking about the race and my training and the handful of mishaps I've had along the road, I decided it would be best to put off the Ironman dream until next year. It just seems like I've had some strange things come up that are telling me "don't do this, Adrian". The thing too is that I'm a mother now. It's not just about me anymore. I've got a son that needs me way more than I need to do an Iroman. Plus, if I found a doctor to give me the second opinion that I want to hear, I still have the one opinion telling me not to do it. SO, what's the point, right?
I filled out the official "withdrawal form" from Ironman North America. I felt my heart drop in my stomach when the confirmation code came up on my computer screen. It feels so disappointing to have to pull out. I need to take this feeling and remember it. I need to use it as fuel for my training in the future. It feels like I just DNF'd a huge race. I need to use this to motivate me. I don't want this feeling again!
Since I made the decision, I feel like the pressure is off. I feel like I can enjoy my training again and not worry about how I'm going to get through the tough weekends ahead. I am going to pick some races and set some new goals for the year just so I stay motivated to train and stay in shape. I really want to find the passion in my training and racing again... if I feel confident in my fitness and can compete in a few of the shorter local races this will set me up for a better training experience next year. I feel like I would have done the Ironman this year and I would have been proud to cross the finish line but I also felt that I was a little ambitious coming straight from having a baby to completing an Ironman just over a year later. At least the next time around I'll have more time to build my base and get my strengths back in the areas that really need help!
So - I guess for this year I will not be an Ironman.
So it looks like this is not the year for my inaugural ironman.... last weekend while on a training ride I had a little bike accident. I took a fall and hit my head. I had a pretty bad concussion. I don't remember a thing from the accident. I really don't remember anything from the day at all. I woke up in the Emergency Room at Baylor Hospital. Apparently I was unconscious for a short period of time, but the time I was conscious, I can't remember.
I was having problems that day with my bike seat. My seat post kept sliding down into the frame. It was weird because in my previous training rides, I kept adjusting my seat because I felt like it was too low. I would ride and by the time I finished, I would think to myself "maybe I didn't raise it enough". So before I rode it again, I would raise it up higher... and it would drop down again. It wasn't until last weekend that I actually realized it was a problem with my bike.
There was a pretty big group of us riding together - the Ironman group was planning on riding 80 miles then running afterwards. I was a little upset with my seat situtaion so Brian and I pulled off the group and went to find a hardware store. We needed to find a bolt to keep my seat post from dropping down. We repaired my bike and I went to find the group while Brian started to ride home to let the babysitter go. He turned around to check on me and that's when it happened. He said he thought I was adjusting my shoe or something, and I just crashed. I don't know how fast I was going, I don't know if I hit something that made me lose my balance... who knows. He raced over to take care of me... he said I was bleeding pretty bad so he called 9-1-1 for an ambulance.
My friends that I was riding towards came up to the scene of the accident. From what I was told, it didn't look good. The paramedics loaded me up and off we went. I was in the hospital all day. I didn't have much memory of anything so we weren't able to go home until that started coming back. Poor Brian, he said I asked him the same questions every 20 minutes. Talk about freaky, right? I got 14 stitches in my head and got banged up on the left side of my body. I got a little road rash, but nothing compared to the head injury.
I was feeling dizzy all last week - each day did improve a bit... Monday I was feeling loopy and dizzy and couldn't concentrate much... by Thursday and Friday I was feeling better - but still not 100%. I went to see a neurologist on Thursday morning and he recommended that I stay off my bike and out of the pool for about six weeks. I was a little heart broken because the Ironman is in seven weeks and the most intense training is upon us.... The doctor said that where I suffered the hit was a sensitive place on my head... he explained that I didn't get a concussion like Troy Aikman gets a concussion, but more serious. He said that there is a possibility of having a seizure when I become fatigued. I decided then and there that I would look for a second opinion. I really wanted to do the race.
It was this last weekend that really made me change my mind. After thinking about the race and my training and the handful of mishaps I've had along the road, I decided it would be best to put off the Ironman dream until next year. It just seems like I've had some strange things come up that are telling me "don't do this, Adrian". The thing too is that I'm a mother now. It's not just about me anymore. I've got a son that needs me way more than I need to do an Iroman. Plus, if I found a doctor to give me the second opinion that I want to hear, I still have the one opinion telling me not to do it. SO, what's the point, right?
I filled out the official "withdrawal form" from Ironman North America. I felt my heart drop in my stomach when the confirmation code came up on my computer screen. It feels so disappointing to have to pull out. I need to take this feeling and remember it. I need to use it as fuel for my training in the future. It feels like I just DNF'd a huge race. I need to use this to motivate me. I don't want this feeling again!
Since I made the decision, I feel like the pressure is off. I feel like I can enjoy my training again and not worry about how I'm going to get through the tough weekends ahead. I am going to pick some races and set some new goals for the year just so I stay motivated to train and stay in shape. I really want to find the passion in my training and racing again... if I feel confident in my fitness and can compete in a few of the shorter local races this will set me up for a better training experience next year. I feel like I would have done the Ironman this year and I would have been proud to cross the finish line but I also felt that I was a little ambitious coming straight from having a baby to completing an Ironman just over a year later. At least the next time around I'll have more time to build my base and get my strengths back in the areas that really need help!
So - I guess for this year I will not be an Ironman.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
SOooooooooooooooooooo SOoooooo Tired.
Damn, what's a girl got to do to get some sleep, people? I didn't sleep well last night because my throat was hurting so badly. I was coughing up lung biscuits all night = yummy. The night before, some dumb-ass dog was barking up a storm. I think it must belong to our neighbors. The dirty ones.
Anyway, I'm still doing this whole training thing and sleep is MOST IMPORTANT. I can barely keep my eyes open right now - which is not a good thing because I'm working. Or I'm at work, blogging. There must be something crazy in the air because my allergies are kicked up into high gear. I took the normal Flonase this morning, had to follow up with some Claritin right before lunch because my ears were itching so bad. Not to mention my eyes were burning and nose was running. I thought it could be from sitting in the hot tub at the gym last night (the chemicals were making my eyes water). The itchy head makes me think otherwise....
So this month is going to be the most intense month of training. I've got to make sure I don't miss any workouts and I don't cut any of them short. We've got one month of hard core training as we approach our peak weekend (Memorial Day). This is going to be the true test! This weekend we're doing an OWS then we'll do a long brick Saturday morning (80+ then run 45 minutes) followed by a 15 miler on Sunday. WOO HOO!! Mama's going to be T-I-R-E-D after all that.
I hope we can find a babysitter for the weekend. I'd like for Brian to be able to workout with us / coach us. Plus, I think he needs to get out of the house! He's been so incredible these last few months. He not only has been a great coach, but an amazing father and husband. Just this morning he left me the sweetest message on my mobile phone telling me how proud he was that I was getting up super early to go do my workouts, then take all my crap to the gym to get ready for work... then come home and be a mom. It really helps to hear him say that. Sometimes I think that I'm just out here doing this crazy training and nobody understands how tough it is with a baby. BUT, he understands. He is going through his own difficult time right now. I know it's hard for him to sit back while I'm training. Not just sit back, but watch our son while I'm gone too. I knew he'd be a great father, but I had no idea just how great. I'm so lucky to have him as a husband, coach and best friend.
There probably aren't a lot of husbands that would do what he's doing. Just last weekend during a training ride, a friend was talking about how he gets the feeling from his wife that "he's leaving again??" - where my situation at home is completely different. Brian is like "hey babe, you gonna go do that workout today?". He knows what it takes to train for this kind of event... I do have feelings of guilt for leaving Brian at home w/ the baby... but since he knows what it takes, he doesn't complain at all. I'm very glad that I don't have to deal with a spouse giving me grief for being gone all those hours on the weekend riding my bike.
It's these things that I really need to remind myself of - how lucky I am to have a loving husband and child. How fortunate I am to be physically capable of running and riding my bike... I need to look at this way more than looking at my speed / my time... I just bought and started reading the Triathlete's Guide to Mental Training. If anything keeps me from succeeding, it's my own mind. I hope I can put some of the content to good use, and I hope that I can read it all before the big race.
Damn, what's a girl got to do to get some sleep, people? I didn't sleep well last night because my throat was hurting so badly. I was coughing up lung biscuits all night = yummy. The night before, some dumb-ass dog was barking up a storm. I think it must belong to our neighbors. The dirty ones.
Anyway, I'm still doing this whole training thing and sleep is MOST IMPORTANT. I can barely keep my eyes open right now - which is not a good thing because I'm working. Or I'm at work, blogging. There must be something crazy in the air because my allergies are kicked up into high gear. I took the normal Flonase this morning, had to follow up with some Claritin right before lunch because my ears were itching so bad. Not to mention my eyes were burning and nose was running. I thought it could be from sitting in the hot tub at the gym last night (the chemicals were making my eyes water). The itchy head makes me think otherwise....
So this month is going to be the most intense month of training. I've got to make sure I don't miss any workouts and I don't cut any of them short. We've got one month of hard core training as we approach our peak weekend (Memorial Day). This is going to be the true test! This weekend we're doing an OWS then we'll do a long brick Saturday morning (80+ then run 45 minutes) followed by a 15 miler on Sunday. WOO HOO!! Mama's going to be T-I-R-E-D after all that.
I hope we can find a babysitter for the weekend. I'd like for Brian to be able to workout with us / coach us. Plus, I think he needs to get out of the house! He's been so incredible these last few months. He not only has been a great coach, but an amazing father and husband. Just this morning he left me the sweetest message on my mobile phone telling me how proud he was that I was getting up super early to go do my workouts, then take all my crap to the gym to get ready for work... then come home and be a mom. It really helps to hear him say that. Sometimes I think that I'm just out here doing this crazy training and nobody understands how tough it is with a baby. BUT, he understands. He is going through his own difficult time right now. I know it's hard for him to sit back while I'm training. Not just sit back, but watch our son while I'm gone too. I knew he'd be a great father, but I had no idea just how great. I'm so lucky to have him as a husband, coach and best friend.
There probably aren't a lot of husbands that would do what he's doing. Just last weekend during a training ride, a friend was talking about how he gets the feeling from his wife that "he's leaving again??" - where my situation at home is completely different. Brian is like "hey babe, you gonna go do that workout today?". He knows what it takes to train for this kind of event... I do have feelings of guilt for leaving Brian at home w/ the baby... but since he knows what it takes, he doesn't complain at all. I'm very glad that I don't have to deal with a spouse giving me grief for being gone all those hours on the weekend riding my bike.
It's these things that I really need to remind myself of - how lucky I am to have a loving husband and child. How fortunate I am to be physically capable of running and riding my bike... I need to look at this way more than looking at my speed / my time... I just bought and started reading the Triathlete's Guide to Mental Training. If anything keeps me from succeeding, it's my own mind. I hope I can put some of the content to good use, and I hope that I can read it all before the big race.
Thursday, April 27, 2006
On top of the world - at least for a moment...
Today I actually saw my fastest mile split since before LG was born! Now I have a hard time writing my time down and talking about it because I feel like people think "oh, that's it?" But for me - I felt awesome! We did the relay run today and the first mile was a WU - I felt pretty good - then the first mile I ran was 7:45 - which was a bit surprising, I have seen this split a time or two... but it was the second mile that got me - 7:33! I haven't seen this kind of split on my watch in a long, long time!
It's amazing how long it takes to get back into everything after having a baby. I worked out almost the entire pregnancy, then I started training shortly after the birth of my son. In fact, I did my first marathon 9 months after having him.... so it's not like I've been sitting around on my ass.... so it's just taken a long time to get the speed going again. Not that I've ever had that much speed, but to see anything under 8:00 is great for me.
Today I actually saw my fastest mile split since before LG was born! Now I have a hard time writing my time down and talking about it because I feel like people think "oh, that's it?" But for me - I felt awesome! We did the relay run today and the first mile was a WU - I felt pretty good - then the first mile I ran was 7:45 - which was a bit surprising, I have seen this split a time or two... but it was the second mile that got me - 7:33! I haven't seen this kind of split on my watch in a long, long time!
It's amazing how long it takes to get back into everything after having a baby. I worked out almost the entire pregnancy, then I started training shortly after the birth of my son. In fact, I did my first marathon 9 months after having him.... so it's not like I've been sitting around on my ass.... so it's just taken a long time to get the speed going again. Not that I've ever had that much speed, but to see anything under 8:00 is great for me.
Tuesday, April 25, 2006
Feeling Funky.
I'm so tired and I feel so crappy and sad. I went to track this morning, tried to run - but my legs are just beat. I'm beat. I'm the only one out there that is struggling to put one foot in front of the other. And don't even talk about doing any kind of "speed work". Yeah, right. I couldn't even get around the track once without stopping, walking and thinking about leaving. I tried to pull it together for my first 400. Nope, nothing. I stopped, walked and thought about quitting.
Finally, I pulled it together enough to run an easy few miles.... the rest of the gang was doing the scheduled workout. I kept thinking "how are they doing that?" My legs just weren't doing it for me today. I hate days like this because I feel like such a loser and I start doubting myself and my abilities. I wonder how the hell am I ever going to get to that finish line? I also think about how the training must be soooo much easier for others - and I also start thinking about how I'm probably going to be the last person in our group to finish and I'm going to be bummed about it. Why do I even care though? Because I know others care about it? I'm sure they're thinking how they're going to beat me. And why? Why does it matter who you beat in the Ironman? Why do I think about this shit? Why do I hear people talking about how they finished first or whatever in a bike rally and I crack up. I mean, honestly - who the hell cares?
Maybe I just wish I had a little streak of competitiveness in my blood. I wish something like that would motivate me to train harder - but it just doesn't. Maybe it's because I'm older - and I used to be faster, but I'm not that concerned about it anymore. I just want to finish this damn race! I just want to have the strength to pick up my little boy afterwards and give him a big ol' hug and kiss and tell him that Momma missed him all day!!
I just need something that makes me feel good about all this training. What makes me feel good about it? I'm so tired that I feel like I could cry at the drop of a hat today. I just don't feel so good about myself. I know that I'm worn out when every little thing about myself starts to bug me. I was getting ready for work this morning and was thinking that I need to color my hair. Need to get cuter clothes, need new shoes, need new makeup.... I just look at myself and think I'm not very attractive. Other days I don't feel this way at all. Other days I think "Damn, you look good for being a mom!!" Not today though. I'm just beat down and worn out!
Ahhhhh, the life of Ironman training.
I'm so tired and I feel so crappy and sad. I went to track this morning, tried to run - but my legs are just beat. I'm beat. I'm the only one out there that is struggling to put one foot in front of the other. And don't even talk about doing any kind of "speed work". Yeah, right. I couldn't even get around the track once without stopping, walking and thinking about leaving. I tried to pull it together for my first 400. Nope, nothing. I stopped, walked and thought about quitting.
Finally, I pulled it together enough to run an easy few miles.... the rest of the gang was doing the scheduled workout. I kept thinking "how are they doing that?" My legs just weren't doing it for me today. I hate days like this because I feel like such a loser and I start doubting myself and my abilities. I wonder how the hell am I ever going to get to that finish line? I also think about how the training must be soooo much easier for others - and I also start thinking about how I'm probably going to be the last person in our group to finish and I'm going to be bummed about it. Why do I even care though? Because I know others care about it? I'm sure they're thinking how they're going to beat me. And why? Why does it matter who you beat in the Ironman? Why do I think about this shit? Why do I hear people talking about how they finished first or whatever in a bike rally and I crack up. I mean, honestly - who the hell cares?
Maybe I just wish I had a little streak of competitiveness in my blood. I wish something like that would motivate me to train harder - but it just doesn't. Maybe it's because I'm older - and I used to be faster, but I'm not that concerned about it anymore. I just want to finish this damn race! I just want to have the strength to pick up my little boy afterwards and give him a big ol' hug and kiss and tell him that Momma missed him all day!!
I just need something that makes me feel good about all this training. What makes me feel good about it? I'm so tired that I feel like I could cry at the drop of a hat today. I just don't feel so good about myself. I know that I'm worn out when every little thing about myself starts to bug me. I was getting ready for work this morning and was thinking that I need to color my hair. Need to get cuter clothes, need new shoes, need new makeup.... I just look at myself and think I'm not very attractive. Other days I don't feel this way at all. Other days I think "Damn, you look good for being a mom!!" Not today though. I'm just beat down and worn out!
Ahhhhh, the life of Ironman training.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
Adding Insult to Injury
What a weekend. We started it off by running 13 miles at Cedar Hill State Park - and yes, there is a reason it's called Cedar HILL! It was a challenging run to say the least. For once though it wasn't a million degrees out there. Usually when we head out for the hill workout - it's blazing hot and we're running on the pavement with no shade. Thank goodness it wasn't like that this weekend. I had a pretty good run, just took it nice and easy, didn't attack any hills. There were a couple of times when I had to stop running up. I'd stop for a sec., regroup then hit it again. I got major chafing on my thighs. I finally just got to the point of tucking my shorts under (into the liner) and running. I'm sure I looked really hot to the passers by! OH WELL. MY legs were stinging and I still had almost six miles to go. OUCH. The thing about chafing - and doing a hard run is that all you can think about is the pain. I actually thought about asking people as they drove by if they happened to have any vaseline, or a tube of chapstick or something that I could use to ease the pain! I didn't do it... and I finished the run, crusty chafed thighs and all.
Sunday morning, got up at 5:45 a.m., headed out to McKinney, TX for the Rolling Hills bike rally. This was my first century ride. My legs were pretty sore and tired from yesterday's run. I wasn't feeling too good about riding 100. As I drove by White Rock Lake this morning, I noticed how calm the water looked. "At least there's no wind" is what I told myself. I guess by the time we drove north 60 miles, the wind had picked up a little. We started the ride, I decided I was going to ride my own pace and try not to bonk! I rode with Guy for 70 miles or so... I even drafted off him in the headwinds at around miles 20-30... I wasn't feeling too hot early on. I was really focusing on my pace and on eating regularly. I felt pretty good throughout the ride, with the exception of having to pee. I had been waiting and waiting for the next rest stop. Finally, I just couldn't take it anymore and decided to let it fly. I looked around me - checked to make sure no one was riding behind me... man did that feel good.... until BURN / OUCH / SHIT / WHAT WAS I THINKING??? My legs are chafed from running yesterday, I'm wearing bike shorts and I just peed myself!! Rookie mistake.
At about mile 70, Guy wasn't feeling too hot so I ended up finishing the ride alone. It was really great not to hit that wall where you've crossed over the distance that you've never done before - you know, where your body is screaming to you "we've never done this, what are you doing?" I somehow avoided that altogether today. It felt great.
First one down, three more to go... the fun has just begun. Giddyup Ironmama!!
What a weekend. We started it off by running 13 miles at Cedar Hill State Park - and yes, there is a reason it's called Cedar HILL! It was a challenging run to say the least. For once though it wasn't a million degrees out there. Usually when we head out for the hill workout - it's blazing hot and we're running on the pavement with no shade. Thank goodness it wasn't like that this weekend. I had a pretty good run, just took it nice and easy, didn't attack any hills. There were a couple of times when I had to stop running up. I'd stop for a sec., regroup then hit it again. I got major chafing on my thighs. I finally just got to the point of tucking my shorts under (into the liner) and running. I'm sure I looked really hot to the passers by! OH WELL. MY legs were stinging and I still had almost six miles to go. OUCH. The thing about chafing - and doing a hard run is that all you can think about is the pain. I actually thought about asking people as they drove by if they happened to have any vaseline, or a tube of chapstick or something that I could use to ease the pain! I didn't do it... and I finished the run, crusty chafed thighs and all.
Sunday morning, got up at 5:45 a.m., headed out to McKinney, TX for the Rolling Hills bike rally. This was my first century ride. My legs were pretty sore and tired from yesterday's run. I wasn't feeling too good about riding 100. As I drove by White Rock Lake this morning, I noticed how calm the water looked. "At least there's no wind" is what I told myself. I guess by the time we drove north 60 miles, the wind had picked up a little. We started the ride, I decided I was going to ride my own pace and try not to bonk! I rode with Guy for 70 miles or so... I even drafted off him in the headwinds at around miles 20-30... I wasn't feeling too hot early on. I was really focusing on my pace and on eating regularly. I felt pretty good throughout the ride, with the exception of having to pee. I had been waiting and waiting for the next rest stop. Finally, I just couldn't take it anymore and decided to let it fly. I looked around me - checked to make sure no one was riding behind me... man did that feel good.... until BURN / OUCH / SHIT / WHAT WAS I THINKING??? My legs are chafed from running yesterday, I'm wearing bike shorts and I just peed myself!! Rookie mistake.
At about mile 70, Guy wasn't feeling too hot so I ended up finishing the ride alone. It was really great not to hit that wall where you've crossed over the distance that you've never done before - you know, where your body is screaming to you "we've never done this, what are you doing?" I somehow avoided that altogether today. It felt great.
First one down, three more to go... the fun has just begun. Giddyup Ironmama!!
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
It's amazing how different training feels when the other stress factors in my life are at a "calm". Last month, work kicked my ass. I was so stressed out about everything.... now work has slowed down, I've been able to have some "me" time and I haven't missed a day of training in almost two weeks! I feel like a different person. My husband always says that it's not the training that is tough, it's fitting the training in with the rest of your life that's the tough part. That's sooo true. I really hope that work continues to be more manageable for the next couple of months as my mileage will increase as we get closer to our peak training.
This coming weekend I'll be doing my first century ride. My husband is actually going to ride with me! I can't believe it. I don't know if he's actually riding to ride "with me" - or just in support of all the other IM folks that he's training these days. It's going to be a breakthrough workout, so he wants to be there for us. I pray the weather is good. It's been so windy the past few weekends which has made riding a bit more challenging. The other thing going on right now is the heat. We hit 101 degrees yesterday - it's April! What is going on? This is the time to really focus on nutrition and staying hydrated.
I'm feeling pretty good about my training at this point, my body is tired but I have been able to get through the workouts. Last weekend, I had bike problems (again... sigh) but was able to get it repaired and even though it took a while, I got back int he saddle and finished the workout alone / in the wind / around the lake! I was proud of myself for not getting frustrated and skipping the rest of the workout entirely! The next morning I got up and ran 15 (or close to 15) before going to church for the Easter service.... it was just a good feeling to get up, knock out the workout and then have the rest of the day to have quality time w/ the family.
It's going to be more time intensive until after Memorial Day weekend.... I just have to plug along, get through these next 6 weeks or so then I'll be on my way!! I think. I hope.
This coming weekend I'll be doing my first century ride. My husband is actually going to ride with me! I can't believe it. I don't know if he's actually riding to ride "with me" - or just in support of all the other IM folks that he's training these days. It's going to be a breakthrough workout, so he wants to be there for us. I pray the weather is good. It's been so windy the past few weekends which has made riding a bit more challenging. The other thing going on right now is the heat. We hit 101 degrees yesterday - it's April! What is going on? This is the time to really focus on nutrition and staying hydrated.
I'm feeling pretty good about my training at this point, my body is tired but I have been able to get through the workouts. Last weekend, I had bike problems (again... sigh) but was able to get it repaired and even though it took a while, I got back int he saddle and finished the workout alone / in the wind / around the lake! I was proud of myself for not getting frustrated and skipping the rest of the workout entirely! The next morning I got up and ran 15 (or close to 15) before going to church for the Easter service.... it was just a good feeling to get up, knock out the workout and then have the rest of the day to have quality time w/ the family.
It's going to be more time intensive until after Memorial Day weekend.... I just have to plug along, get through these next 6 weeks or so then I'll be on my way!! I think. I hope.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
Sacrifices.
This is an email I sent to my non-triathlete friends. In my attempt to let them peek at what my days are like right now. Hopefully they'll understand that I'm not intentionally neglecting them. It's lonely training all the time! I miss my friends a lot. The bad thing is that once the training is over, I feel that I've missed out on so much. Even when I do see them now, I usually can't stay out late, due to a workout the next morning. Or I get somewhere late because of a workout I had to do before I was meeting them. Sacrifice is the name of the game, right?
A day in the life. Or a few days..
Monday
7:30 a.m. - “SHIT”, I overslept! I can’t believe Will woke up so many times last night… get out of bed … legs are so tired from the 80 mile bike ride on Saturday and the 11 mile run on Sunday. Damn, I’m tired. Shower, head to work, late again.
11:45 a.m. - head to the pool for a lunch swim workout, get in about 2500 meters, hurry up and shower, get ready for work (again), call in my lunch order to Two Sisters, pick it up and back at my desk at 1:35 eating.
5:45 p.m. - leave work, pick up Will, get home around 6:15. Change clothes, go for an easy bike ride with Brian and Will (in the trailer). Get home around 7:30, put all the gear away, feed Will and get him in the tub. Brian heads out for pizza (chicken pizza at least). It’s getting near 9:00 p.m., try to shovel some food in so I can start getting LG ready for bed.
9:30 p.m. - William and I fall asleep in the chair, Brian picks him up and puts him in bed, I continue to sleep. Finally, I wake up and decide to jump into bed – so tired that I don’t wash my face, brush my teeth or even change out of my sweatshirt and pants!
Tuesday
5:30 a.m. Alarm goes off, get ready for track, grab all my work clothes so I can get ready at Baylor after the workout. Legs are really heavy today, not a good workout at all.
12:30 p.m. – run all my personal errands (weekly Target trip) – get all the Easter stuff for William’s daycare party, grab lunch on the way back to work and eat at my desk.
5:30 p.m. – leave work, pick up William from day care, get home around 6:30. Load William in his wagon for a walk in the neighborhood and some quality time together. Get home, grab some dinner and start getting him ready for bed. I fall asleep in the chair AGAIN. At least this time I got up and changed and got cleaned up before I jumped into the real bed!!
Wednesday
6:30 a.m. – alarm goes off, get up and get ready for work, grab all my workout gear for the day, get the car loaded. Wake Will up at about 7:45, get him ready for day care and we’re out the door. I actually might make it to work on time! Yay.
12:00 – head to the pool for my swim workout, swim – get ready, grab lunch at Two Sisters and eat at my desk.
5:45 – leave work, head to the lake to get a 2 hour bike ride in, get some food on the way home, feed Will and start the bedtime ritual….
Thursday
5:30 a.m. – alarm goes off, gotta get up and head out for my Thursday morning run – we’re running hills today, I’m going to hate walking up and down those damn stairs at work….
This is an email I sent to my non-triathlete friends. In my attempt to let them peek at what my days are like right now. Hopefully they'll understand that I'm not intentionally neglecting them. It's lonely training all the time! I miss my friends a lot. The bad thing is that once the training is over, I feel that I've missed out on so much. Even when I do see them now, I usually can't stay out late, due to a workout the next morning. Or I get somewhere late because of a workout I had to do before I was meeting them. Sacrifice is the name of the game, right?
A day in the life. Or a few days..
Monday
7:30 a.m. - “SHIT”, I overslept! I can’t believe Will woke up so many times last night… get out of bed … legs are so tired from the 80 mile bike ride on Saturday and the 11 mile run on Sunday. Damn, I’m tired. Shower, head to work, late again.
11:45 a.m. - head to the pool for a lunch swim workout, get in about 2500 meters, hurry up and shower, get ready for work (again), call in my lunch order to Two Sisters, pick it up and back at my desk at 1:35 eating.
5:45 p.m. - leave work, pick up Will, get home around 6:15. Change clothes, go for an easy bike ride with Brian and Will (in the trailer). Get home around 7:30, put all the gear away, feed Will and get him in the tub. Brian heads out for pizza (chicken pizza at least). It’s getting near 9:00 p.m., try to shovel some food in so I can start getting LG ready for bed.
9:30 p.m. - William and I fall asleep in the chair, Brian picks him up and puts him in bed, I continue to sleep. Finally, I wake up and decide to jump into bed – so tired that I don’t wash my face, brush my teeth or even change out of my sweatshirt and pants!
Tuesday
5:30 a.m. Alarm goes off, get ready for track, grab all my work clothes so I can get ready at Baylor after the workout. Legs are really heavy today, not a good workout at all.
12:30 p.m. – run all my personal errands (weekly Target trip) – get all the Easter stuff for William’s daycare party, grab lunch on the way back to work and eat at my desk.
5:30 p.m. – leave work, pick up William from day care, get home around 6:30. Load William in his wagon for a walk in the neighborhood and some quality time together. Get home, grab some dinner and start getting him ready for bed. I fall asleep in the chair AGAIN. At least this time I got up and changed and got cleaned up before I jumped into the real bed!!
Wednesday
6:30 a.m. – alarm goes off, get up and get ready for work, grab all my workout gear for the day, get the car loaded. Wake Will up at about 7:45, get him ready for day care and we’re out the door. I actually might make it to work on time! Yay.
12:00 – head to the pool for my swim workout, swim – get ready, grab lunch at Two Sisters and eat at my desk.
5:45 – leave work, head to the lake to get a 2 hour bike ride in, get some food on the way home, feed Will and start the bedtime ritual….
Thursday
5:30 a.m. – alarm goes off, gotta get up and head out for my Thursday morning run – we’re running hills today, I’m going to hate walking up and down those damn stairs at work….
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Damn, I'm tired! My legs wouldn't move this morning. After the long weekend of training, I had a great swim on Monday afternoon. I did an easy ride at the lake with the husband and LG after work.... I fell asleep immediately after LG hit the hay (slept in my pants and sweatshirt with makeup - gross!). I got up early to do track this morning and man, it was tough.
I was supposed to do 1 mi. WU, 2 x 400, 2 x 1600, 2 x 400, 2 mi CD. It was just too much for my legs. I felt like my legs weighed a hundred pounds. And can we just talk about how friggin' boring it is to run around the track? I realized today that we run counter-clockwise at the track but everywhere else we run clockwise. Hmmm, why is that? Why is it that I was thinking of random stuff while trying to do a track workout? Could it be that my mind was desperately searching for something to stimulate it during the tedious loops of the track? I needed something to keep me going. I don't know what it is about that stupid track. It seems like I'm always beating myself up out there. I can't remember a time when I actually enjoyed my run at the track. It's soooooo hard mentally! What can I do to shake it up a little bit? Maybe I need to start running w/ the iPod again. I just didn't want to get hooked on training w/ music when I won't be able to use it during a race.
I ended up cutting my workout short this morning. I couldn't finish the second mile repeat. I did finish it, but I stopped running briefly - then tried to regroup and finish... it just didn't work for me. I cut off my 2 mile cool down. GEEZ. I can't keep cutting my workouts, but shit - I'm TIRED!! and I have to work and I have to have the energy to be a Mom and a wife when I get home... someone needs to have a discussion with my coach! Ha - I live w/ him.
I think I'm due for a massage. Something to work the tiredness out... time to call "The Donald". I need to keep better track of my massages, I know it's important for training and recovery to get them regularly.
Does everyone else feel this dang tired? Anyone? How do you do it? When work is slow, it's all I can do to keep my eyeballs open! Geez, I've still got 1.5 hours to go, maybe noone will notice if I schedule myself for a meeting in one of the private conference rooms (take a little nap), only thing is that I'll probably wake up w/ drool and weird marks all over my face. Or better yet, I won't wake up until like 7:00 p.m.
I was supposed to do 1 mi. WU, 2 x 400, 2 x 1600, 2 x 400, 2 mi CD. It was just too much for my legs. I felt like my legs weighed a hundred pounds. And can we just talk about how friggin' boring it is to run around the track? I realized today that we run counter-clockwise at the track but everywhere else we run clockwise. Hmmm, why is that? Why is it that I was thinking of random stuff while trying to do a track workout? Could it be that my mind was desperately searching for something to stimulate it during the tedious loops of the track? I needed something to keep me going. I don't know what it is about that stupid track. It seems like I'm always beating myself up out there. I can't remember a time when I actually enjoyed my run at the track. It's soooooo hard mentally! What can I do to shake it up a little bit? Maybe I need to start running w/ the iPod again. I just didn't want to get hooked on training w/ music when I won't be able to use it during a race.
I ended up cutting my workout short this morning. I couldn't finish the second mile repeat. I did finish it, but I stopped running briefly - then tried to regroup and finish... it just didn't work for me. I cut off my 2 mile cool down. GEEZ. I can't keep cutting my workouts, but shit - I'm TIRED!! and I have to work and I have to have the energy to be a Mom and a wife when I get home... someone needs to have a discussion with my coach! Ha - I live w/ him.
I think I'm due for a massage. Something to work the tiredness out... time to call "The Donald". I need to keep better track of my massages, I know it's important for training and recovery to get them regularly.
Does everyone else feel this dang tired? Anyone? How do you do it? When work is slow, it's all I can do to keep my eyeballs open! Geez, I've still got 1.5 hours to go, maybe noone will notice if I schedule myself for a meeting in one of the private conference rooms (take a little nap), only thing is that I'll probably wake up w/ drool and weird marks all over my face. Or better yet, I won't wake up until like 7:00 p.m.
Sunday, April 09, 2006
Whew, this was a hard weekend. Did an 80 mile ride in Lancaster, TX (bike rally), it was friggin' windy as you know what. The last 20-25 miles were sooooo hard. I was on my brand new Griffen and it felt awesome. I took two bikes to the rally, I was hoping to take the Griffen for the first 20 miles then switch it out w/ the road bike. It was the maiden voyage, so I wasn't ready to commit for the entire ride. I was feeling pretty comfy on the Griffen so I decided to stay with her (or him, I haven't determined the sex or a name for the new ride).
Anyway, the ride was nice. I enjoyed myself, I decided that regardless of where any of my friends were that I was not going to let it affect me or my training. Keeping my head clear and focusing only on myself and what I had to do that day really made a difference. For the first time in a long time, I wasn't stressed out while training. I just have to remind myself that it's about me and my ability, not anyone else - and certainly not my ability to keep up with them. Once I got home, I played with LG, cleaned up a few things - then I swear, I was hit by a truck! WOW, out of nowhere... I took a hard nap and was out of it pretty much the rest of the night. This is after 80 miles on the bike. I don't know how I'm going to get across that finish line. Better yet, when I do cross that finish line, I can't imagine how bad my body is going to hurt!
Today I ran 11 miles, nice and easy. Ran w/ a friend... came home and worked in the yard literally all afternoon with my husband. Went to dinner and again, feeling completely worn out. I need sleep! I wished I could sleep for like 20 hours straight. Someone just hook up an IV to feed me. Let me sleep!!
Good night.
Anyway, the ride was nice. I enjoyed myself, I decided that regardless of where any of my friends were that I was not going to let it affect me or my training. Keeping my head clear and focusing only on myself and what I had to do that day really made a difference. For the first time in a long time, I wasn't stressed out while training. I just have to remind myself that it's about me and my ability, not anyone else - and certainly not my ability to keep up with them. Once I got home, I played with LG, cleaned up a few things - then I swear, I was hit by a truck! WOW, out of nowhere... I took a hard nap and was out of it pretty much the rest of the night. This is after 80 miles on the bike. I don't know how I'm going to get across that finish line. Better yet, when I do cross that finish line, I can't imagine how bad my body is going to hurt!
Today I ran 11 miles, nice and easy. Ran w/ a friend... came home and worked in the yard literally all afternoon with my husband. Went to dinner and again, feeling completely worn out. I need sleep! I wished I could sleep for like 20 hours straight. Someone just hook up an IV to feed me. Let me sleep!!
Good night.
Friday, March 31, 2006
Okay, so I'm still on board w/ the whole Ironman thing. I've been extremely stressed out though. Extremely stressed about work, training and life in general. Is this what everyone goes through? I've cried so much lately because of the amount of stress I'm under. I got really upset at a workout because everyone took off riding without me. I was totally frustrated with my husband because I missed the "start" of the ride, I was cursing him for being so selfish, then I had a meltdown because two of my friends didn't even wait to ride w/ me. They just took off. Ironman training isn't about training with others, it's about getting in the time and distance. I don't know what's gotten into me. My bike cables broke on the ride, so I ended up riding short and running long. By the end of the run, I was bawling because I was just so sick of training all alone. I felt like I didn't have any friends or anyone that gave a shit about me. When I got to the car, Stephanie asked me what happened to my bike and I just snapped. I felt shitty all day long. Shitty for having a crappy workout, shitty for snapping at my friends and shitty for treating my husband the way that I did. Why have I been feeling sorry myself lately? I feel victimized for some reason....
Later in the week, William was having a rough morning, crying and crying - crawling under my feet and whining for me to hold him. I had to get ready for work, and the non-stop crying was driving me nuts. I actually shut myself in my bathroom to get away from him. That only made things worse, I hurt his little feelings. The crying continued and I continued to get more and more frustrated with him. I yelled for him to quit crying, when I did, it startled him. I felt like the worst mother in the world. I will never forget what that looked like. William startled by my yelling. It breaks my heart when I think about it. Why has my patience left me? Why am I doing this? Why am I feeling like this? I love my son like nothing else in this entire world. I would die for him and here I am hurting him. I hurt his feelings. I finally realized what I had done so I picked him up and held him, rocked him, kissed and hugged him. I was upset because he was so upset. I just don't know if it's the training that's doing this to me - or is it the job?
I'm extremely busy at work, have been feeling completely overwhelmed lately. I've been working my butt off on this one promotion and just can't get all my other work done. I don't like to disappoint anyone by missing deadlines, but I'm barely keeping my head above water these days. I'm just all over the place right now. I have three big things in my life and I don't feel like I'm doing a good job at any of them.
I want to be a good mother, and wife. I want to enjoy my job and I want to complete an Ironman. Can it all be done? Can it happen with such a young baby? Can it happen without ruining my marriage? I feel like I'm a different person lately. I don't want to be this super stressed out, tired, bitchy woman. I want to enjoy life and do the right things. I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I should give up the IM dreams for now. If it's something that everyone goes through while training, then I'd rather finish it and not have to start over. If it's just a terrible time in my life - and it's unreasonable to do this, I don't want to sacrifice my marriage and my relationship with my son for an athletic event. I really wish I had the answer for this.
I'm about to buy a bike that is super expensive. Part of me is thinking that I shouldn't get it because there is still the possibility that I won't do the Ironman. I don't want to spend that money on something that may not get used for the initial reason behind the purchase. Although, I may feel more motivated to ride once I get the new bike. If I feel comfortable and powerful, I'll love to be on that bike!!
I'm in a state of confusion right now. I wish someone had the answsers for me.
Until then, good night.
Later in the week, William was having a rough morning, crying and crying - crawling under my feet and whining for me to hold him. I had to get ready for work, and the non-stop crying was driving me nuts. I actually shut myself in my bathroom to get away from him. That only made things worse, I hurt his little feelings. The crying continued and I continued to get more and more frustrated with him. I yelled for him to quit crying, when I did, it startled him. I felt like the worst mother in the world. I will never forget what that looked like. William startled by my yelling. It breaks my heart when I think about it. Why has my patience left me? Why am I doing this? Why am I feeling like this? I love my son like nothing else in this entire world. I would die for him and here I am hurting him. I hurt his feelings. I finally realized what I had done so I picked him up and held him, rocked him, kissed and hugged him. I was upset because he was so upset. I just don't know if it's the training that's doing this to me - or is it the job?
I'm extremely busy at work, have been feeling completely overwhelmed lately. I've been working my butt off on this one promotion and just can't get all my other work done. I don't like to disappoint anyone by missing deadlines, but I'm barely keeping my head above water these days. I'm just all over the place right now. I have three big things in my life and I don't feel like I'm doing a good job at any of them.
I want to be a good mother, and wife. I want to enjoy my job and I want to complete an Ironman. Can it all be done? Can it happen with such a young baby? Can it happen without ruining my marriage? I feel like I'm a different person lately. I don't want to be this super stressed out, tired, bitchy woman. I want to enjoy life and do the right things. I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I should give up the IM dreams for now. If it's something that everyone goes through while training, then I'd rather finish it and not have to start over. If it's just a terrible time in my life - and it's unreasonable to do this, I don't want to sacrifice my marriage and my relationship with my son for an athletic event. I really wish I had the answer for this.
I'm about to buy a bike that is super expensive. Part of me is thinking that I shouldn't get it because there is still the possibility that I won't do the Ironman. I don't want to spend that money on something that may not get used for the initial reason behind the purchase. Although, I may feel more motivated to ride once I get the new bike. If I feel comfortable and powerful, I'll love to be on that bike!!
I'm in a state of confusion right now. I wish someone had the answsers for me.
Until then, good night.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Hell Week
It's week # 11 in the IM training program, we've been in Fredericksburg, TX for Hell Week. I've gone before for bike training only in the past we didn't have a baby with us. Needless to say, the training is pretty tough with a young one but couple that with staying in a hotel room for several days with him, it can be a challenge. He's bored with the lack of play area and I can't get a nap!!
I didn't enjoy myself this year at Hell Week, it probably had a lot to do with the challenges of being a wife and a mother and the intense training without any recovery time. I found myself doubting whether or not I even wanted to do the Ironman afterall. I was riding with my training partners / friends and they were really focused on the training. I on the other hand wanted to have some fun while training. When I've gone to HW before, we really did focus on fun and the training. I wasn't registered for an Ironman at the time, so maybe it was easier to have fun.
This year it was a different group of people. They had never been before, they didn't know the "rules" of riding in the Hill Country. You get in a lot of difficult miles, you ride at an easy pace. Day one of HW, we were at "race pace". It was ridiculous. I started getting aggrivated within the first 20 miles. I decided that I would drop back and try to enjoy the ride. Day 2 didn't get any better. Although we talked about riding easier, we didn't. AND the winds were hellacious. We had wind gusts of up to 35 miles. I literally felt like I was going to get blown off the road. I was again wondering why I was even out there when it was so unenjoyable. I stopped and rested on the side of the road for a few minutes. I had to collect my thoughts. As I sat there under a tree, I realized how beautiful the country was. It was a beautiful day despite the wind. Other cyclists rode by, asking if I was okay, and I was perfect! I decided to get back on the bike and make it to the rest stop. There I found my friends... of course they were "waiting to make sure I was okay".... geez. I don't need a mom out there. I just needed to collect my thoughts. I had decided under that tree that I was going to do these rides my way. I was going to ride nice and easy and just focus on the distance. We started riding back into town... I got dropped by my friends again so I stopped along the side of the road and called my husband to come pick me up. I know he was probably disappointed in me because he would have NEVER EVER done anything like that. When it comes to athleticism, he's a different breed. He agreed to come out to get me. I began pedaling again, my friends realized that I was pretty far behind them so they decided to stop and wait for me. As we continued to ride, I mentioned that I had called Brian. I did NOT mention that I had requested a pick-up! After fifteen minutes or so, I see my husband's car. Immediately, Harry tells me that in all the years of being at HW we had never SAG'ed in and we weren't going to start now! (it's good to have someone keep you in check, right?!) So I told Brian to go back into town, and I would ride in.
I don't know what was making the ride so tough - was it the wind? was it the one friend that kept talking about everything she knew? I mentioned that I was awake at 2 am because the baby woke up. She tells me she didn't sleep well either. It's hard for people without children to understand what it's like to take care of children. Take care of children 24/7 that is. You say that you're tired, they say "we're all tired". See, what they don't know is that after all that riding - your legs and back are pretty tired, you can't tell your one year old that you can't pick him up. You can't tell him that you need a nap. To your child and spouse, you've been gone for several hours and they're glad you're back. They don't want you to go to sleep, and honestly I would feel so selfish if I did go sleep. I missed them while I was gone. Part of me felt guilty that my husband had been taking care of LG for so long. I want to give him some relief.....
By day 3, my legs were tired, I was tired. We started the ride at a good pace but it wasn't long before I was riding solo. I just couldn't hold the pace. Once again, I found myself frustrated with riding, doubting myself and pretty much decided that Ironman was NOT for me. If I couldn't enjoy any of the training, then why was I doing it? Is it really worth the sacrifice of spending so much time away from my family? I decided to call my husband to come get me, this time I was going to get in the car! I didn't give a shit about what my friends thought or what my husband thought. I had made my mind up that it just isn't in the cards.
As he drove us back to the hotel, I verbalized all my frustrations. I said it out loud: I'm out. I'm not doing the Ironman. I just kept thinking about how hard the training is, how I'm not so good at triathlons anyways. I couldn't even keep up on these stupid training rides. Then all the negative thoughts just poured through my head. The same old crap: I'm just an average person - nothing special, average looks - need to drop some lbs, average everything. I never feel like I'm great at anything. I feel like I just don't fit in anywhere. I don't have a place. I don't have friends. I have friends, but not great friends. No friends that really understand me. As I was struggling in Fredericksburg, I once again found myself not fitting in. I have friends who are training for triathlons - but none with kids. I have friends who have kids that think I'm crazy for the amount of training I'm doing. I just wish there was one person that was in the same place as I am. That is facing some of the same difficulties I am - and that can shed some light on how to overcome some of these obstacles....
I mentioned that my husband, Brian is "wired differently". He's done the ironman eight times. Four of those were in Hawaii. So when I try to talk to him about how tough the training is, there's not much sympathy there. It's just different. He also coaches me, so really - the sympathy card doesn't come out too often! He did give me a little booster - he told me that when I cross the finish line, it will mean that much more. Knowing how much I've had to work for, how much to sacrifice... the reward would be so much sweeter. I thought about this for a couple of days, rested and enjoyed some much needed "me" time and some much needed quality time with LG. I guess this just goes to show how important the recovery time is.
I didn't enjoy myself this year at Hell Week, it probably had a lot to do with the challenges of being a wife and a mother and the intense training without any recovery time. I found myself doubting whether or not I even wanted to do the Ironman afterall. I was riding with my training partners / friends and they were really focused on the training. I on the other hand wanted to have some fun while training. When I've gone to HW before, we really did focus on fun and the training. I wasn't registered for an Ironman at the time, so maybe it was easier to have fun.
This year it was a different group of people. They had never been before, they didn't know the "rules" of riding in the Hill Country. You get in a lot of difficult miles, you ride at an easy pace. Day one of HW, we were at "race pace". It was ridiculous. I started getting aggrivated within the first 20 miles. I decided that I would drop back and try to enjoy the ride. Day 2 didn't get any better. Although we talked about riding easier, we didn't. AND the winds were hellacious. We had wind gusts of up to 35 miles. I literally felt like I was going to get blown off the road. I was again wondering why I was even out there when it was so unenjoyable. I stopped and rested on the side of the road for a few minutes. I had to collect my thoughts. As I sat there under a tree, I realized how beautiful the country was. It was a beautiful day despite the wind. Other cyclists rode by, asking if I was okay, and I was perfect! I decided to get back on the bike and make it to the rest stop. There I found my friends... of course they were "waiting to make sure I was okay".... geez. I don't need a mom out there. I just needed to collect my thoughts. I had decided under that tree that I was going to do these rides my way. I was going to ride nice and easy and just focus on the distance. We started riding back into town... I got dropped by my friends again so I stopped along the side of the road and called my husband to come pick me up. I know he was probably disappointed in me because he would have NEVER EVER done anything like that. When it comes to athleticism, he's a different breed. He agreed to come out to get me. I began pedaling again, my friends realized that I was pretty far behind them so they decided to stop and wait for me. As we continued to ride, I mentioned that I had called Brian. I did NOT mention that I had requested a pick-up! After fifteen minutes or so, I see my husband's car. Immediately, Harry tells me that in all the years of being at HW we had never SAG'ed in and we weren't going to start now! (it's good to have someone keep you in check, right?!) So I told Brian to go back into town, and I would ride in.
I don't know what was making the ride so tough - was it the wind? was it the one friend that kept talking about everything she knew? I mentioned that I was awake at 2 am because the baby woke up. She tells me she didn't sleep well either. It's hard for people without children to understand what it's like to take care of children. Take care of children 24/7 that is. You say that you're tired, they say "we're all tired". See, what they don't know is that after all that riding - your legs and back are pretty tired, you can't tell your one year old that you can't pick him up. You can't tell him that you need a nap. To your child and spouse, you've been gone for several hours and they're glad you're back. They don't want you to go to sleep, and honestly I would feel so selfish if I did go sleep. I missed them while I was gone. Part of me felt guilty that my husband had been taking care of LG for so long. I want to give him some relief.....
By day 3, my legs were tired, I was tired. We started the ride at a good pace but it wasn't long before I was riding solo. I just couldn't hold the pace. Once again, I found myself frustrated with riding, doubting myself and pretty much decided that Ironman was NOT for me. If I couldn't enjoy any of the training, then why was I doing it? Is it really worth the sacrifice of spending so much time away from my family? I decided to call my husband to come get me, this time I was going to get in the car! I didn't give a shit about what my friends thought or what my husband thought. I had made my mind up that it just isn't in the cards.
As he drove us back to the hotel, I verbalized all my frustrations. I said it out loud: I'm out. I'm not doing the Ironman. I just kept thinking about how hard the training is, how I'm not so good at triathlons anyways. I couldn't even keep up on these stupid training rides. Then all the negative thoughts just poured through my head. The same old crap: I'm just an average person - nothing special, average looks - need to drop some lbs, average everything. I never feel like I'm great at anything. I feel like I just don't fit in anywhere. I don't have a place. I don't have friends. I have friends, but not great friends. No friends that really understand me. As I was struggling in Fredericksburg, I once again found myself not fitting in. I have friends who are training for triathlons - but none with kids. I have friends who have kids that think I'm crazy for the amount of training I'm doing. I just wish there was one person that was in the same place as I am. That is facing some of the same difficulties I am - and that can shed some light on how to overcome some of these obstacles....
I mentioned that my husband, Brian is "wired differently". He's done the ironman eight times. Four of those were in Hawaii. So when I try to talk to him about how tough the training is, there's not much sympathy there. It's just different. He also coaches me, so really - the sympathy card doesn't come out too often! He did give me a little booster - he told me that when I cross the finish line, it will mean that much more. Knowing how much I've had to work for, how much to sacrifice... the reward would be so much sweeter. I thought about this for a couple of days, rested and enjoyed some much needed "me" time and some much needed quality time with LG. I guess this just goes to show how important the recovery time is.
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